Let’s face it, we all love to receive flowers be it on valentines day or just to make your day more special. Getting a bouquet of carefully arranged flowers makes you feel special, but did you know that the blooms do more then just brighten up your room. They can carry a secret message, and not just from a secret love letter tucked in among the stems. Today lets explore the world of floriography, the “language of flowers.”
Hidden Messages
During the Victorian era, open displays of emotion where taboo (especially for women). The rigid social rules of the upper class often left people without a way to express their thoughts and feelings. So they formed new ways to get their message across, on where a single bouquet could speak volumes. Floriography wasn’t just a passing fancy either, it was an entire social language. Books were published listing floral meanings and every detail mattered. From the flower type, the colour, and even how it they were arranged and handed to someone. Flower arrangements became a new language conveying declarations of love, friendship, betrayal and even subtle warnings, flower arrangements become a new language. Today many of these meanings are forgotten, but I like to keep the tradition alive in my home and will often choose my flowers to express these subtle messages.
So what did they say? Well, here is an beginners break down.
🌹 Red Rose – Love, of course. But deep, passionate love.
🌼 Marigold – Grief, sorrow, or sometimes jealousy.
🌷 Pink Tulip – A gentle declaration of affection.
🌻 Sunflower – Admiration, loyalty, “you are my sunshine.”
🌸 Camellia (white) – You’re adorable / perfect.
🌿 Basil – Good wishes… or hatred, depending on the context. (it’s a complicated herb, that one.)
💐 Mixed bouquet – A complex message… often a way to say “it’s complicated.”
Sending a Message Without Saying a Word
Here’s a curious thing, the flowers aren’t the only part of the language. How the arrangements were delivered also meant something. Here is quick summery for the next time you deliver your flowers!
- A bouquet held upright = the message was affirmative.
- A bouquet presented upside down = the opposite meaning was intended.
- If you received a flower with the right hand, the message was accepted.
- With the left hand? Rejected.
It makes you wonder how many heartbreaks began not with a letter, but with a flower turned the wrong way.
Preserving the Unspoken
Many Victorians didn’t just give flowers, they kept them. Sometimes they pressed the precious petals between book pages or tucked into diaries. That way they could keep the memories of their secret messages as tokens of cherished friendships or bittersweet goodbyes. Personally, I often think about starting my own diary filled to the brim with these little tokens rather than long winded paragraphs. I like the idea of pressing petals for each month and jotting down a few words beside them each day. A dandelion for childlike joy, a lavender sprig for calm, or even a daisy for when my mood feels particularly sunny.
If you like the idea of preserving some flowers for yourself, here is some tips on how!
What You’ll Need:
✔ Fresh flowers or small leaves
✔ A heavy book
✔ Parchment paper or blotting paper (this will keep your book pages safe!)
✔ A little patience
Steps:
- Pick the perfect bloom – Choose a flower that’s flat or can be flattened (pansies, daisies, violets, etc.). But if you have a thicker flower such as a rose, you can pull off some of the petals to preserve.
- Pat it dry – If there’s moisture on the petals, gently dab with a paper towel.
- Place it between paper – Sandwich your flower between two pieces of parchment or blotting paper.
- Press in a book – Carefully place the paper and flower in a book, then stack more books or something heavy on top.
- Wait 1–2 weeks – Check after a week. When the flower feels dry and papery, it’s ready!
Pro tip: don’t forget to use your pressed flowers in some fun crafts like:
– Nature diaries
– Homemade cards
– Frameable artwork
– Bookmarks with floral meanings written beneath
Need a language of flowers cheat sheet? Here is one for you to print out and keep at home
The Victorian language of flowers may have faded with time, but I believe its spirit is still alive. We still give flowers to one another to express love and affection. So next time you receive a bouquet, take a moment. Maybe it’s just a kind gesture… or maybe it’s a silent “I’m thinking of you”. Because sometimes, the sweetest messages are the ones we don’t say out loud. 🌸✨
Love from,
An Earth Nerd
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